New Blog Post: Giving People Grace When They Don't Deserve It
As I inquired of the Lord what my first blog post should be after taking a long hiatus, He told me told me to share a topic from my own personal journey over the last three months. So, my first topic coming back is...Giving People Grace When They Don't Deserve It. One thing I have learned about God is He will make you keep taking the same test over and over again until you pass it or learn the lesson it came to teach to you. For me, the test was learning how to show honor and humility to those who dishonor, disrespect, and devalue me. And what a test it has been! I know as a Christian, I am suppose to to pray for my enemies, and bless them. But God showed me that blessing them goes beyond just praying for them. When God tells us to to bless our enemies, His definition of bless is an action word.
It is hard enough praying for someone you don't like, hate, or just plain ole can't stand, but to bless them...to be kind to them, honor them, show them mercy, give them grace...that's takes a level of spiritual maturity that can only be developed through help and guidance of Holy Spirit. To obtain it will require you to develop the type of patience and perseverance Jesus endured on the Cross. Like Jesus, you will have to cry out to God, "Not my will, by Your will be done." It's no easy task, but one that must be done if you want to become spiritually mature in your faith walk with God.
Wondering how it can be done? How do you give grace to the person that you feel doesn't deserve it? Let's talk about it. First and foremost, you must understand that without the power of the Holy Spirit you cannot do it. Many people criticized, judged, and talked about Brandt Jean, the younger brother of Botham Jean, for hugging and forgiving his brother's killer, Amber Guyger. People all over the county were outraged, shocked, and bewildered on how an Brandt could publicly forgive Amber and even ask her for hug. A hug? Talk about giving grace to someone one who didn't deserve it, but who are we to say she didn't.
To give someone grace who you deem doesn't deserve it, is to recognize you are no different than them. You like the person you are commending to hell, or withholding grace from, has fallen short of the glory of God too. Translation, you have sinned and someone believes you are unworthy of grace too. How ironic, huh. You have offended someone. You have hurt someone. You have lied to someone. You have betrayed some. You have made someone cry. You have slandered someone's name. Someone right now, as you are reading this post, feel deeply within their soul that you undeserving and unworthy of God's grace, forgiveness, and love. Yes, you. Have you asked for forgiveness from the people you have offended and hurt?
We love, myself included, to tell God about why we shouldn't extend mercy or grace to someone. Yet, God doesn't punish us as we deserve for all of our sins. (Psalms 103:10) When we confess, renounce, and repent of our sins, God removes our sins as far away from us as the east is from the west (Psalms 103:13). Funny, how God forgives us when we don't deserve it, but we can't do the same for the others. But we call ourselves a Christian. No, this isn't a feel good post. Go watch a Joel Osteen sermon for that. No, this post is to convict you, because God wants to spiritually mature you.
Now that you are convicted, let me give you my strategies on how to give someone grace when they don't deserve it.
1. Is there someone in your life that God is nudging you to forgive and bless? Struggling to do it? Pray and tell God about it. Be completely honest to God in prayer about how you feel about the person. Vent, cry out, complain, get everything off your chest.
2. Then write a list of all their sins and offenses against you. After you write the list, forgive them of everything they have done to you. Forgive them in faith.
3. Pray for them. Pray for them everyday. I suggest setting aside 30 minutes a day to fervently pray for. Ask the Holy Spirit to lead you in your prayer. It will be a struggle at first. Your flesh will not want to do it, but the more you pray for them, the easier it will become.
4. Expect the person you are praying for to start acting a donkey towards you. We wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against spirits. The spirit in them is going to rise up against you because you are praying for them. So their attitude towards you is going to worse at first...BUT KEEP PRAYING FOR THEM.
5. Bless them. Remember bless is an action word. Be kind in to them. Don't pop off at the mouth when they say something crazy to you, because they will. Forgive them and stop bringing up their offenses against you when you talk to them. Do something nice for them. Romans 12:20 says, "If your enemy is hungry, buy him lunch! Win him over with kindness. For your surprising generosity will awaken his conscience, and God will reward you with favor."
6. Understand, if God is pressing up on you to extend grace to someone, He is trying to extend grace to you as well. I know it's hard to bless and pray for someone who has continually offended and hurt you, but to truly become more Christlike, you must. If Jesus can forgive and extend grace and mercy to the people who crucified Him, you can extend grace to person or people you think don't deserve it. Ask the Holy Spirit to help you. Pray, fast, and mediate on the Word. You can do it because you can do all things through Christ who strengths you!
I pray this post blessed you! If it did, please share it on your various social media platforms.
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